Being home alone is dangerous for me. An eating disorder feeds on secrecy; time alone in my apartment used to mean Ed's time. That association is difficult to break. So, I am slowly relearning how to be healthy while I'm alone.
My apartment has a small loft area. This space had been collecting clutter since Tyler and I moved in. Once in a while it served as a guest room, but mostly it served as storage space. When I came home from residential treatment, I wanted to create a safe place for myself -- somewhere I could go to be calm, alone with my thoughts, and away from danger. While it is still a work in progress, this weekend the space finally became usable. Now, when I'm afraid of falling into disordered behavior, all I have to do is climb the stairs to my safe haven.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
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I love your space. It looks calm, safe and a great place to be.
ReplyDeleteDid you paint the wall? It's beautiful! That does look like a wonderful safe haven.
ReplyDeleteit's very swirly :-)
ReplyDeleteActually, my talented best friend, Tyler Thomas painted the wall! He's such an amazing artist that it sometimes discourages me from doing my own artwork. But, I try to remember that I'm not doing it to be the best artist, but, rather, to get some calm and enjoyment out of the process.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. D.'s wonderful writing talent discouraged me from writing for a while, but then I thought how every person's creative talent is different and unique. What you create comes from you and no one could do the same thing!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I definitely try to keep that in mind as much as possible. It's nice to hear that you've felt that way too :)
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